Election stressing you out? Here are 5 psychologist-approved tips to make you feel better



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For many people, stress related to the approaching presidential election is palpable. Even, at times, unbearable. Judith Martinez, 32, a nonprofit founder in Los Angeles, says the election feels like an existential crisis and has contributed to bouts of insomnia.

“Beyond what happens in November, one of the hardest things for me to grapple with is not knowing what the rest of life is going to look like,” she says.

“I’m concerned about World War III,” says Ken Sheer, 60, a real estate developer based in Santa Monica. “Both sides are saying it’s a fight to save democracy, and it probably is. … I’m worried about my kids and their kids.”

They’re far from alone. A recent poll by the American Psychiatric Assn. found that more than 73% of Americans say they feel stressed about the election, while the Pew Research Center found that 65% of us feel exhausted when thinking about politics. As a psychologist, I often hear about election-related stress from my patients — and I feel it myself.

Election anxiety is understandable. The outcome of this race is important and we have limited control over it. And no matter who wins, Kamala Harris or Donald Trump, roughly half the country will experience disappointment. Fortunately, there are research-backed ways to effectively calm yourself without simply tuning out the news. And simply knowing that those tools are available can be important, because your perception of stress can affect your response.

“If you believe you have the capacity to cope, you transform stress into a surmountable challenge,” says James Gross, a psychology professor at Stanford University who researches emotion regulation.

In contrast, when you think you don’t have enough gas in the tank, as Gross puts it, stress morphs into a threat, leaving you “feeling overwhelmed, depressed, anxious, perhaps leading to withdrawal and isolation.” In a 2012 study, researchers found that the combination of heightened stress and the perception that stress hurts health correlated with a 43% increased risk of premature death.

Rather than worrying about being worried, focus on shifting into coping mode. Below are a handful of tips to help you do that.

1. Commit rather than catastrophize

When thinking about the possibility that your preferred candidate will lose the election, don’t make half-hearted disaster plans, such as announcing that you will leave the country. Instead, invest your energy in things that give you a sense of agency: listening closely to a loved one, throwing yourself into a hobby, reading a novel.

When it comes to engaging with politics, think about concrete actions you can take to champion the causes that matter to you. Maybe it’s phonebanking, maybe it’s donating. All of these will feel more rewarding than focusing on future outcomes that are impossible (and stressful) to predict.

2. Remember, emotions come in waves

It can also help to remind yourself that even negative emotions such as anxiety and anger will fluctuate over time. Human beings are notoriously bad at what’s known as affective forecasting, or accurately predicting the intensity and duration of our emotional experiences in the future.

“It may feel that the world is going to end if your preferred person doesn’t win,” said Matt Killingsworth, a senior fellow at the Wharton School at University of Pennsylvania. “But at the same time, we probably imagine that the effect is going to be bigger on our personal lives than it might actually be, at least emotionally.”

Killingsworth founded trackyourhappiness.org, a global research project in which 200,000 people use smartphones to assess their mental habits and contentment in daily life. What he found is that “the kinds of things that do make you happy, whether trivial or profound, will still be operative when you’re stressed about something else.”

Watching your kids play soccer, a nice interaction at work, a gorgeous fall day — these and a billion other things affect your mood on a minute-to-minute basis, and can bring pleasure even in times of distress. Killingsworth quotes the late Nobel Prize-winning psychologist Daniel Kahneman: “Nothing in life is as important as you think it is when you’re thinking about it.”

3. Learn to pivot

Channel your energy into what you’re doing in the moment, rather than letting your mind wander to stressful subjects. Research spearheaded by Killingsworth has found that most people’s minds are wandering roughly 50% of the time, though we barely notice that we’re doing it. Instead of drifting off to focus on your internal news ticker, you can practice anchoring yourself with a simple exercise. Feel your feet on the floor and notice what’s right before your eyes.

“The external world tends to be better than what’s playing in our mind,” Killingsworth said.

4. Communicate with kindness

Interacting with people in real life, instead of online, can also help counter election stress. Film director James Kicklighter, whose documentary “The American Question” explores our political divides, says a big part of the problem is that “we interact through social media and other toxic cesspools of un-formed opinions and information,” rather than getting to know each other face-to-face at the many opportunities daily life provides, whether in line at a local coffee shop, a weekly fitness class or through community organizations.

Of course, conversations about the election can be difficult, even with loved ones. In a recent YouGov poll, one in four people said they have ended a friendship over political differences. Dan Harris, a former journalist for ABC News and host of the “10% Happier” podcast, finds inspiration in a nonprofit group called Braver Angels, which brings together Democrats and Republicans across the country to build connection and appreciate shared values.

Relationships fractured by politics can benefit from the same techniques used in couples therapy. When talking about controversial topics, drop the impractical agenda of changing the other person’s mind. Instead, aim for “accurate disagreement” by focusing on curiosity and reducing criticism, inflammatory language and stereotyping.

Especially in times of uncertainty, real-life relationships provide a dose of hope and comfort. “Company will reduce your misery,” Harris says. “Never worry alone.”

5. Practice finding balance

Remember to also stick with habits that protect your mental health, such as maintaining a sensible sleep schedule and exercise routine. Limit your news consumption, checking it only at specific times instead of constantly doomscrolling.

In my own life, I find myself thinking about the philosophy underpinning dialectical behavior therapy, an approach designed for the most challenging situations and intense emotions: learning to simultaneously wholeheartedly accept and change. So rather than scowling and catastrophizing, I’m turning toward relaxing my face and mind, as well as donating to causes that pull at my heart, knowing that all emotions are malleable, especially when we’re able to anchor ourselves in the present.

Jenny Taitz is a clinical psychologist and an assistant clinical professor in psychiatry at UCLA. She is the author of “Stress Resets: How to Soothe Your Body and Mind in Minutes” and “The Stress Resets Deck: 50 Cards to Feel Better in Minutes.”



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